Saturday, April 3, 2021

Rules Worth Following: NO BEING CREEPY

In 2017 ago I wrote a post about rules from a Cranky Old Man blog. His take on the rules were just plain fun and interesting. The rule that I loved was so to the point and I have never forgotten it. It went like this:
  • "NO BEING CREEPY". 
I try to follow that rule everyday...and it is truly is hard sometimes. 

But today's post is a little more serious. I want to talk about road blocks we put in our own path...ones that can in may cases make a bad time in our life even worse. 

I was going through my Facebook page last night reading all those items I have shared over the last few months-words of wisdom from people wiser than myself yet actually could have come from my mouth. 

The one that struck me was an idea about all the rules we abide by in our daily life...sort the laundry into several piles, sort the knives, forks and spoon before returning them to the drawer, sort the laundry again before returning them to the drawers, push in your chair when you leave the table and don't drop the baby.

Most of these rules, except the one about dropping the baby, are just suggestions. If you have ever looked up and found your world in shambles to the point that you feel worthless, you will know what I mean. Rules can do that.

In the Facebook post taken from Quora, the lady that wrote  was very depress and actually could not do her work because the rules were just too much. So the dishes sat molding in the sink. Her house began to smell. It all seemed so insignificant that she hesitated to share her increasing depression with her therapist because...who care about dishes? Other people were in a lot worse shape over really big stuff so dishes were simply not important.

After much urging she finally talked about her problem. She hated to prewash the dishes before them went in the an old not working very good dishwasher...it went like this:

“Run the dishwasher twice.” [the therapist said]

I began to tell him that you’re not supposed to, but he stopped me.

“Why the hell aren’t you supposed to? If you don’t want to scrub the dishes and your dishwasher sucks, run it twice. Run it three times, who cares?! Rules do not exist. 


Rules do not exist! I think the therapist is a genius...washing the dishes before washing the dishes does not need to happen. And adding a cycle or two was not really important if that is what you need to do to get through the day. It is o.k.

Most rules are not written on a big tablet and handed down from the mount. Most of them are more guidelines that can be erased or skirted around.

So the thought for the day is "Getting it done might be more important that how you are getting it done!" The rules be hanged. 

S-o-o-o-o...what rules did you break today?

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I have written several posts on "Rules". I like this one:

Friday, March 26, 2021

Just Plain Stuck

Do you think this is going to work?
Egypt: I suppose you noticed on the news today...a gigantic ship is stuck in the Suez Canal, just plain stuck tight in-the-mud. My husband read me the article this morning. Since the Suez Canal is a world away, I could listen without feeling much of anything. 

However, as with everything in our world today, sooner or later what happened will effect us. The world just keeps on shrinking and we are all so closely connected.

No single human being is getting blamed...yet. It turns out the wind did a number on the ship that is as long as the Empire State Building is tall. My husband comment was, "I suppose sometimes a ship of that kind can actually be too big." Yes, I think he might be right.

But the thing that made me laugh was the picture of a lonely heavy equipment scoop moving earth beside that huge monolith of steel sitting stuck in the mud. All I could think was that this is the ultimate "can an ant move a rubber tree plant?" event. Holy Cow!

I hear Egypt is going to start dredging and are hoping for high tide soon. They have also talked about unloading the 10 of thousands of containers the ship is transporting. I wish them good luck, lot and lots of luck!

The worst thing of all is that ships are arriving all of the time, waiting their turn to go through the canal...many hundreds of them. Commerce from around the world is simply going no where soon.

China: In 2010 China had a traffic jam that held people hostage for over 10 day. Wikipedia has it's very own page about that disastrous even.

The China National Highway 110 traffic jam was a recurring[1] massive traffic jam that began to form on August 13, 2010, mostly on China National Highway 110 (G110) and Beijing–Tibet expressway (G6), in Hebei and Inner Mongolia.[2][3] The traffic jam slowed thousands of vehicles for more than 100 kilometers (60 mi) and lasted for 10 days.[3][4][5] Many drivers were able to move their vehicles only 1 km (0.6 mi) per day, and some drivers reported being stuck in the traffic jam for five days.[5] It is considered to be one of the longest traffic jams by some media.[6][7][8]

My son and his wife were living in Shanghai at the time. They told about the Chinese people and their ingenious reaction at that time. Vendors set up shop on the highway feeding the people in the cars. It is hard to imagine I think. While the Chinese people as very used to crowds of citizens pushing impatiently, I can imagine that the honking of horns much have driven them mad.

In the time we were in China we noticed that the Chinese way of solving a disagreement ends in a fist fight. I think that that traffic jam may have pushed many people over the edge.

Boston, Mass.: We were on the East Coast back in the early 80 when an airline went on strike and traffic across the country came pretty much to a halt. I think it was United. We were trapped with a plane load of teens in Boston, I had the flu and those famous Boston blackouts were happening all of the time. AND Three Mile Island Nuclear Plant malfunctioned. It was a nightmare. Still it was nothing compared to the "just plain stuck" others are and have endured. Besides we had good bragging rights for many years! That is important.

As for the Suez Canal, at least people are on ships and cannot get at each other or I think that the captain and crew of that ship would be in great danger. The whole world will probably be very mad at them.

Have a wonderful day...read the new and tell me what you know!

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p.s. Did I mention that oil prices will probably be going up? Of course they are!

 

Tuesday, March 23, 2021

What will that look like?

Many, many times I have written about growing old with a positive attitude. I am beginning to wonder if I truly understood what that looked like in real life.

I turned 79 on my last birthday but this is not really about me. Those people around me are a little older and a little younger in their age. But this is not about that either.

I have often talked about a study group in San Diego that focused on cohorts...age mates I suppose. They were all women. But more importantly, they were not well at all. But in spite of aches and pains, these women remained positive. I thought, great, at least we will not be grumpy or angry. That is good I think.

My friends was celebrating 100 years of
Life at a party. She played 18 holes of
Golf with lady’s club.
They have special rules for her.

But what I did not realize is that as people grow older they miss what they cannot do anymore. Finding a replacement for a lifelong love of reading or golfing or even mowing the lawn is not easy. Each person misses something just a little different. What I would miss more than anything is being a snowbird...I love my life today. It is perfect for both my husband and me. There would be an empty space left in life.

I was at a gathering for my friend Franny last Wednesday. (She was being given a 100th birthday party.) I sat with a group of seemingly well, happy and satisfied women...my age I suppose but some were younger. Their age was not so much important as their health. I am talking about health issues that cannot be fixed. 

After the obligatory “organ recital” were everyone shares their aches and pains, the conversation moved to things everyone loves to do and a could not do anymore.It was very interesting how they were all struggling for that next passion to replace what was gone.

I think we should start a handicapped golf league so we could still play a little golf and have a happy hour afterwards.

I love playing cards and it fills most of my social time.

The thing I really want is to spend time here at the golf course with other women...I love the social part of golf almost more than golfing!

 

Visit to a local resort in Tucson.

Of course there are ways to all of those things. A game at putting, cards in the club house and even a scheduled happy hour. Most holes can be filled I suppose. 

That was when I began to wonder about that fourth stage in life. That one where life goes on in spite of it all. That part where disability sets in. Now I am talking about myself. What will I want to do?

One ladies husband is turning 90 soon and she said that he didn’t want to eat anything that was good for him...it sounded so wonderful to him. 

Carole and I always said that when we reached that stage we were going to do all those things that were absolutely forbidden...in her case she is going to take up smoking again. I might have wine for breakfast if that sounds good or eat butter. 

The truth is that making ourself miserable with overdoing our forbidden doesn’t sound like as much fun as it did at one time.

Do you suppose that a day will come when there is an acceptance of the fourth stage or will it be thrust upon us? Will it be on a Friday or a Tuesday? Will in be in the spring  or the summer? Then will we all stop fighting what is happening to find some peace? I don’t know but I do know that my husbands’ s life has never been about sitting still physically or mentally. I am right there with him. I am hoping that being mentally active will be enough to keep us both happy.

Do you have any thoughts?

Have a wonderful day.

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Oh, and as for Franny...she loved her party. She played 18 holes of golf and she beats everyone every time. They are rethinking letting her hit the ball closer on one par three...that is her special rule! She is an amazing women and we all want to be like her when we grow up!

 

Friday, March 12, 2021

Snow Bird Lifestyle at it's Best...Arizona!

Living Room









Honestly, after all these years I feel like a native here in Tucson while I know I am a native Oregonian.  Oregon is full of family and a neighborhood that is close and supportive. Arizona winters are all about another set of friends, golf and restoring old houses. (We are only on our 2nd house so that is something new. We live in them so the restoration fills our days.) When we're here, we miss there and when we're there, we miss here..

The home we own in Arizona is bigger (4 bedrooms) than the one we own in Oregon for a reason. Now we can actually have family visit and everyone can have their own space. They live near us in Oregon. It is turning out to be perfect.

Our home is located on the 5th green at a golf course called Rolling Hills. It is a beautiful Santa Fe style home that is 50 years old. We are cleaning up the yard and the interior. We still need to replace bathroom sinks but they function. It is not perfect but it works beautifully.

Family Room
So the question that is in my mind now is 'Should we make the Arizona home a summer Airbnb? The idea seems so appealing to me. Should we set up that process? May, June and September are wonderful hot summer months with cheap golfing on world class courses. What do you think?

Do you know anything about how that works? I want to hear from you...links, personal thoughts, etc. 

Thank you for listening...it is just a thought! Have a beautiful day!

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Sunday, February 14, 2021

We Own a One Armed Chair

 I don't even know what else to say...a one armed chair. There has to be a bragging right here someplace but I am not finding it.

We bought the dining room set at a Habitat for Humanity thrift store...six chairs and a very long table. It was covered with a cloth and even set (sorta) for dinner. The price was $124 or something...really inexpensive for what it included we thought.

We rented a uhaul truck and the people at the store helped my husband load it. It wasn't until we arrived home that we realized that there might be a problem. It weighed a thousand pounds if it weighed 1 lb. Just getting it out of the truck...well lets back up...just carrying the chairs inside was a monumental job! The table top without the pedestal required incline planes and a hand truck and ingenuity. It would have been handy to own a fork lift or even a pulley but we don't have those.

To make a long story short, we did finally get it in the house, reassembled and turned over. We put it in the spot we had decided to put it and added the chairs. That was when it soaked in on us that we were the proud owners of 4 side chairs, one arm chair and a one armed chair. 

I had picked up a beautiful crocheted table cloth at an estate sale and it covered the top but that chair just sat there being one armed.

Company is coming and I moved that chair out into the living room. I just love it so much. There is something about it that makes me giggle. A funny, fantastic fabulous fancy choice chair. Come on over and visit sometime. I will even let you sit in it...you will be envious I know.

So, what have you bought lately? I hope it makes you smile!

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Saturday, February 6, 2021

"Honey, I'm Sorry but You Tube Cannot Tell us How to Fix This!!"

 Now, let me tell you that this business we love so much...well not really a business just a hobby...of restoring old houses is hard! I mean it is really hard. Yes it can be mentally exhausting but physically? It can push you into the wall.

But most of our problems can be solve with a visit to You Tube. We have installed garbage disposals with sketchy instruction and a microwave over the stove using You Tube. My husband installed a tile floor in my bathroom in Oregon using a You Tube video. Not much cannot be accomplished using a You Tube video. We even watched a man building a log cabin last night so there you have it!

We have been officially moved in for 3 week now. We have gotten the furniture in place, hung pictures and light fixtures. The yard (my dream come true) is next to a golf course putting surface and I've got to tell you it makes my yard look very very bad. I cannot have that! But You Tube cannot help me...only hard work and chemicals can do that.

But my husband has problems of his own. The light fixture over the kitchen sink did not light and after looking at the insides of it, we decided to buy a new one...updated and beautiful. You would think that just putting up a light fixture would be pretty straight forward, right? Not true. Now we have eight wires hanging from the opening and the light in the family room over our chairs does not work nor does the switch to the outside light. What does work is totally mystifying. My husband is scratching his head and sighing a lot...we called an electrician.

We had to finally admit that there was not a video for our problem...our house was wired by a long dead electrician that might have been a little untrained! I don't know that for sure so I need to be kind.

After really taking a good look at the electrical panel outside we can see that it may need to be replaced too. Yikes!

So, here in Tucson the building and buying of real estate is very good. SOOOO, we have to wait on an electrician that is worth his/her salt. I guess Monday evening will be fine...we have only been without a ceiling light for 3 days so a couple more won't matter. I get the evening cooking done early but clean up is a little iffy in the dark!

So, that is how life is going. We love this house. I think it is because like us, it is old and a iffy...:)

How's your life going?

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Sunday, January 31, 2021

How To Be A Snowbird: Going in reverse?

 I've never been very good at backing up...posts and other people's cars should know better. It is their fault I think but then that is just me.

Now I find my life going that way...but in a good way. Sure there are posts and other people in my way but not to worry. It is all good!

When my husband and I bought a new/old house recently that was considerable bigger than the "small house" we thought was going to be perfect, we looked at each other in amazement...what were we doing?



In the end it turned out that our need to be "new" and "trendy" was gone. We just wanted what was comfortable and beautiful in a place we felt at home.

I think I wrote about this house we are turning into our new home earlier. It is located on the 5th green at the golf course we have played at for years. The first time I played here I wanted this house. When it finally came on the market, it was what we had waiting for all these years. In fact, we both wondered if it was not too late. But, we know that if you are going to make dreams come true, sometimes you just need to plow through. So that is what we did.

I find myself thinking that I wish we had had this home when our children were growing up or when most of our grandchildren were little. There is lots of room for all of our family...1800 square feet...yet we two can still clump together and feel cozy. The sun streams in from both the east and west and, in the winter when we will live here, the sun shinesa in our bedroom window almost all day. 

Like us, the house is not new. Built in 1973 it is coming up on 50 years old. What that is in house (dog) years I don't know. I shows its age in a few places but mostly it is a very nice golf course home. Good bones in every way.

So, we have decided that we like reverse and are going to savor every moment we get to experience. I will have my first party next week. A friend will be the guest of honor. We will have so much fun in our own way.

I wish I could invite you all...that would be a dream come true for me. I do love a party!

So what have you been doing?

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