Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Grandchildren will tattle on you! Be careful!

Brothers on the outs!
Over the years my skills as a grandmother babysitter have been questionable and there is a long list of things I have done wrong.  The worst mistake I made was quoting my mother and saying that the neighbor's dog was "so worthless he should be taking out in the back yard and shot".  I guess I had never visualized what that would really look like.  Then my grandson quoted me and tattled about where he heard it.  I was in big big trouble!

So there are a few things I need to warn my daughter-in-law about:
Even though my children have never brought the grandchildren extremely early in the morning they should know that really early is probably not a good idea.  Oh, yes, I do love the babies beyond reason but I am afraid I might hurt them.  I did almost cut my finger off making a sandwich for my husband very early one summer morning.  He doesn't let me use the knife before noon.  It just doesn't seem like a good idea to let me handle babies either.  I just thought you should know.

And your telling me they eat ANYTHING???  That just can't be the truth.  See I tried giving them squash soup last week and the both looked at me like I had two heads.  The older one wanted to know what it was and younger one rubbed it in his hair.  Good thing his hair is orange already.  You didn't even notice did you?  Anyway, if you want me to feed them anything but Mac 'n Cheese let me know.

My next question is about the pull ups and the big boys underwear in the bottom of the diaper bag.  Why are there 3 pull ups, two of the big boy underwear and one pair of blue jeans.  This just does not add up.  If he uses up all the pull ups, I am on to the big boy underwear.  If he gets one pair of those wet what will he wear to cover his legs over the last pair?  I cannot not even think about the answer to the final pair of underwear.  I'm just doing the math.  I will not let him drink very much until you explain to me.

So, I think that is all the information I have for today.  FIY:  call me anytime day or night!  I am up for the job.  I am just warning you about my level of skills and competence.  They are questionable at best!

Mom, Grandma, b

1 comment:

  1. Hee! Very funny. I am childless but was called on once or twice to babysit for a nephew overnight. My thought processes were very similar to what you describe here. I'm pretty sure I made one or two big mistakes because I stopped being asked. Darn!


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