I did wonder what I was thinking…buying a dog, living for a dog, loving a dog.
|Annie and her friend, Moose|
When my husband passed away in December of 2021, I said (in front of my grandchildren, children and perfect strangers) I am going to get a dog. It was one of those moments in grief when a person is trying to figure out how they are going to spend the rest of their life alone…alone.
I own a home in Oregon, a small house in a retirement community near my family AND I own a four bedroom house on a golf course in Tucson. AZ. When my husband was alive, we spent a lot of time restoring houses in Arizona. It was our hobby. But as my husbands health deteriorated, the responsibility became more and more mine. He did the work I made decision and suggestions.
Our plan had been to just keep on going until we couldn’t.
This is where the dog comes into the picture. See, I still love hard work and creating a beautiful world around me. I have been in love with interior design all of my life. And making my world beautiful without a living breathing creature nearby just did not seem right for me…not another human but just a creature to love and care for.
Still in spite of all those realities, I had second thoughts about my plan as soon as the words came out of my mouth! But my grandchildren and children and friends loved the idea…they were totally onboard. They offered to help care for this other being. They picked out dogs and cats and names and when and where. They had so much advice and thoughts on the fact…a lot of advice. A lot of advice.
As for me I was still sorting out my life. Tons of things went to Goodwill and Habitat for Humanity. I don’t know if all widows do this but I was simply making room for my world. A king sized bed was traded for a queen. Furniture was rearranged. Our iwatches were traded for given new homes and new phones were given away and so it went.
I think it was the end of July that Amelia, aged 15, started an internet search for a small, non-shedding sweet puppy. I had decided on a cat but she and her older cousins assumed control, called, made the arrangements and I made a down payment on a tiny dog. And Annie was mine! It was the nudge that I needed.
|Annie at the beach! (I’m the short one in the|
hat. My grandson Sam too!
When I brought her home, she was less than 1 lb. and 8 weeks old. She was afraid but it turns out she was also very brave. She sleeps with me at night. She has peed and pooped in every room in the house. She can run fast and her favorite pass time is chewing.
Almost two month have passed. We have learned about each other. She is almost house broken…well she can get pretty excited when company come so there is that. But she walks on a leash, sleeps in my lap but also sleeps in her crate, on my bed and in the dog training enclosure. I can leave her alone in her crate for hours and she will hold it until I come back. I can carry her in my purse or in a pouch that I carry. She is very durable it turns out.
In a word…perfect, she is absolutely perfect! She is just what I needed. My husband would have loved her and since he was Dr. Doolittle, she would have loved him. I like to believe that.
We are happy.
How about you…what are you doing to make your life better?
Indeed Annie would have loved Dr. Doolittle! What a journey Barbara - and so happy that WE and ANNIE are a part of it! Love you!!!ReplyDelete
Ohmygoodness, what a cutie! You made a good decision, Barbara!ReplyDelete
Annie is a rock star. She is smart and sweet. She is perfect for Mom.ReplyDelete
Dear Barbara, thanks so much for sharing this story of how you moved through the deepest part of your grief after the death of your husband and how Annie is now enlightening and enriching your life.ReplyDelete
Do you read Frank Bruni--the New York Times columnist. He is struggling with becoming blind and when he got that diagnosis and then his partner left him, he, too, felt alone. And what did he do? He left New York City and went south to teach in one of the colleges in the Carolinas. And . . . he got a dog! Originally, he bought he'd be helping the dog. Now he's learned that the dog is truly helping him. He writes about this in his book "The Beauty of Dusk." It is such a rewarding book to read. Peace form Dee Ready (cominghometomyself.blogspot.com)