Saturday, September 22, 2018

Aging: When is a Rose a Rose?

Thank you to Walker Thornton. I loved the article Aging is Beautiful and you made me think.

From Graying and Grinning on a study done at University of California at San Diego. Read this if you think that being a long way down the aging path will be a depressing.
The linear nature of the findings was surprising,..., particularly in magnitude. The oldest cohort had mental health scores significantly better than the youngest cohort, though the former’s physical and cognitive function was measurably poorer than the latter’s.

I belong to a wonderful online group called Women of Midlife. It is a closed group but connects to a public website called Midlife Boulevard. This website is all about women of a certain age. Yes, I fit in while I go about doing what I do.

Recently Walker Thornton asked this question about how or if it was a good idea to talk about aging women

How do you feel about being called againg women? Or reading about 'how we age'...etc?
It didn't occur to me until I read this that women in their fifties or sixties would put off by topics with the tag #agingwomen. I do not see any diminishing of my personal life that makes me unhappy. AND yes, I do like to look beautiful and attractive to those around me. Not obsessed but still... I was puzzled.

The problem could be all about what we think others think of us. Insecurity in our sexuality and appearance can suck the life out of us. Overcoming that can be very hard but it is part of the journey. Or it could be the we resist admitting that we are aging women? Maybe so.

I think it was Eleanor Roosevelt that said, "Don't worry about what others think of you because they don't." It is good to remember that...the world is not looking at us most of the time.

Daughter, me and Great-Granddaughter.
We look different but we are all
 girls! :)
I sort of felt #agingwoman was synonymous with taking a #womenslife'sjourney. Women in their twenties are aging women too...just in different ways. I don't think that a different word would change what we are saying..a rose is a rose.

No matter our age we share so many things and those of us that are further down the road should share our wisdom with those younger than ourselves. In the end, the thing that sets us apart is our appearance.

I have found personally that the fact that I am a late life aging woman has not been easy yet, I have always taken a lot of joy in my life. Now I have reached a place on the road where I am actually rejoice in my age. I really don't want to be or look younger! I like being, dare I say it, old. I like how I look and I like how I am treated. And I like that I don't worry about the men around me admiring a younger woman. Life is good.

I have been writing about the journey in various blogs since 2006-7. I really have not seen things change in the attitude toward older people. What I do see is the boomers making us more powerful. The older that age groups gets the benchmark for "old" will move up and up. Now those of us that are experienced aging women see the mark in the sand as 80 or older.  We will see how it evolves in the general population.

So, how do you feel? Where in the journey are you and what do you think is in store for you? Are you obsessed with your appearance and feel threatened when the man in your life looks at younger women? How is that affecting your quality of life? Be honest with yourself.

Have a wonderful day!



  1. Love that picture of the three adorable ladies at various stages in their lives. I am 75 and feel really good about it. The lines and wrinkles don't bother me; keeping fit and able to do what I want with my physical self is important, but it's also wonderful to sit and knit, read a book, talk with like-minded friends. I would never have believed that life could be so full at this age, when I was a young woman. Good post! :-)

    1. Thank you D Jan. The truth is I never thought about being old ever. Strange huh?

  2. Good thoughtful article. I feel like you in that the journey is natural and relatively easy--having an open attitude certainly helps. My question on FB did show me how many people have negative feelings about the word, "aging"--even though the alternative is pretty dreadful. By talking about it, as we both are, and bringing a more positive and truthful glimpse of aging we can change the attitudes I think. Thank you.

    1. I hope so...coming up with alternative words is difficult but, because of women's attitude, it may be necessary. My younger friends do include me in their gathering but not always. We know we are different even though we are very much alike.

      Thank you for stopping by. That means a lot to me.

  3. I'm with Eleanor. No one else is obsessing about me, so I shouldn't either. Don't worry about looks (Clean and groomed!) and don't compare. There will always be someone 'more' or someone 'less' so don't evaluate. Just love being you!

    1. Not comparing is very hard. I admire your attitude. But, in my case, I look around at those people that are close to my own age. It is good to evaluate where we are really or eventually we could cease to care. Have a wonderful day Diane.


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