Humor: How Many Things Are You an Expert In? I am up to 9!

Not very long ago I wrote about the 10,000 hours it took for the Beatles to become the rock stars that they were. My friend Bob Lowry over at Satisfying Retirement put a comment on the blog post telling how many years he and his wife had been married and how many hours they had spent together. He was wondering why he wasn't a better husband if it only took 10,000 hours to perfect a skill.  When I read his words I could only think that it must be a lot harder to be a husband that it was to be a Beatle.

Anyway that got me to thinking about being an expert. I know how long it takes because I have done the math. The chances of me being an expert on anything that I am not proficient at now are slim to none.

If it really does take 10,000 hours of doing something to become an expert what does that mean. I know the Beatles played for eight hours a day at a gig in Hamburg and they did it long enough to become THE BEATLES. The only thing I can think that I might be an expert at is cleaning and raising children. I suppose that is enough.

But surely there is more. At my age I must have a lot to show for just being alive for 73 years. So I began a list:

Be nice boys!

1. Giving advice...I have made sure to practice that skill to be the point of being banned from cocktail parties and family gatherings.
2. Making spaghetti with meat sauce. My family doesn't say "oh goody, spaghetti!" they say "spaghetti again?" They started saying that very early in our marriage. We eat spaghetti a lot...maybe a few kabillion times in my 54 year marriage.
3. Blowing problems off...my favorite response to a big problem is "You will be JUST fine!" I may have said that 10,000 time during my lifetime.
4. Procrastinating...I never go to the dryer when it buzzes. I wait until the clothes are really wrinkled in, say, a day or two before I fold them. I also put off ironing, grocery shopping, clearing out the refrigerator and getting my junk and gum wrappers out of the car. There is more but you get what I mean.
5. Not putting gas in the car. I can run on fumes longer than anyone I know. I am almost 73 and started driving when I was 16. You add up how many tanks of gas I have NOT filled. It is a lot.
6. Saying "Be nice." I never talk things over with the small children in a reasonable voice like their parents do...my go to admonition is simply "Be nice." I even say it on this blog occasionally. Want to guess how many times I have said that? I only continue because it seems to work...heaven only knows why. 
7. Sitting...a lifetime of practice has made me the world leading expert on sitting. I sit at the computer, on the couch, at parties, on curbs and park benches. If it can be sat on I have sat on it... Next to standing I like sitting the best of anything, right after...
8. ...sleeping. I don't sleep like I did when I was younger but I wish I could. I suppose that we are only allowed 10,000 hours of sleep in a lifetime and I have already used mine all up. But ask me about sleeping and I can give you a lot of information.
9. Reading...thousands of hours of reading is a good thing. However, in my case the house could burn down, my husband divorce me and the dog pee on my leg. I would not notice. Fortunately, none of those things have happened in my many hours with my nose in a book.

What are you an expert at?

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Links to Humor on this blog.

Malcolm Gladwell's 10,000 Hours to Succeed and an Aging Writer